The Pension Man's Life Story

When Pension Man was a little boy he didn't want to be a policeman or a fireman.   He knew he had a greater calling but didn't know what.  He knew he liked little numbered blocks and loved putting them in equal series or installments.   He also liked the idea of getting to keep some of the little blocks if his friends didn't stay long enough to get all the blocks.  But, he still did not know what he wanted to be.  His mommy and daddy worried about him, but he knew that if he just kept waiting the answer would come..

Little Pension Man began to grow up.  He was quite successful in having a large number of friends, school successes and sports.  His favorite sport was basketball. He loved basketball, but everytime he played he began thinking about the assumptions that made basketball work. He began to think wild thoughts, like how long will a basketball live after it is retired.  If each basketball gets a payment of $50 and there was only an initial present value of $10,000 would there be enough funds for all the basketballs.  Things really started to get strange for little Pension Man.

Finally little Pension Man became Big Pension Man, But he still did not know his calling. So he got into training show dogs.  That's right, show dogs.  His favorite was a dog he called Full Funding.   (picture to the right).  One day Full Funding got hit by a truck and as Pension Man morned the loss of Full Funding he yelled out "without Full Funding my dog business is in big trouble".   So, he began to wander down the highways and byways of Mass..  Soon he saw a big building on the horizon.  It was the Marlborough rock.  A  refuge for people like Pension Man.

At the front door of the Marlborough Rock was the Father of Pensions...The Pension God...Annuity Man...  He welcomed Pension Man with open arms and as they shook hands, Pension Man knew his calling, he was going to be the best darn Pension Man in the world.   And now, you know the rest of the story. RJ